MILK FIRST!

I am not sure just how this one is going to work on ‘paper’ but here goes.
 
A few mornings ago, The Wee One woke up within 10 minutes of 5AM as she has on sooo many mornings. Her stomach, you see, is a very reliable alarm clock. I trudged up, came in to pick her up and despite the 5 o’clock shadow on my brain I knew that she would need her “sass” (pacifier) when she was done nursing. It is always better to get both (Wee One and sass) on the first trip.


[half crying] Mommee back! Mommee back! [putting her arms out as I came in] Holdjuw! meoh urst, meoh urst, meoh urst.
[as if somehow the repetition cements the deal…well okay maybe it does]

Yeah yeah honey, you can have some ‘milk first’.
Where’s your sass?
okay [waiting]


I fumble around a bit but a simple two watt nightlight and without contacts I am really better off with echolocation, call me batty. So my hand is sweeping through the bed running over Barbies and discarded who-tails listening for that distinctive clicking of the sass ring when Emma’s pleading for ‘meoh’ suddenly ceases and she gives a little chuckle and points at the area directly in front of her.


Ight dow! (right there)

So she reaches down and picks it up herself, right out of the middle of my clear blue fog.

It may not sound like much but that was seminal.

My (not even) two year old was pretty much mocking me; “it’s right there in front of your face! Hello? What are you blind? Here, let me GET that for you. Eesh!”
If I could have seen a thing in that room I suspect it would have been eyeroll and now here, in the clear light of day, I see my future and it is chock-full of the Wee One’s mocking. But I demand respect!

Respect for one’s elders!
You, existing elders, know of what I speak:
When you see ones gloves on the ground you pick ’em up! They shouldn’t be misplaced.
When you see the vise hanging loose in the garage, make sure it’s good and tight.
And if you see that their radio stations aren’t cool anymore? Make sure and change the presets…all of em…to the same thing.

[sigh] What goes around comes around I guess, so take heart, afore-mocked readers The Wee One is on to me.

3 thoughts on “MILK FIRST!”

  1. So that’s why you kept tightening my vise down to the point where I had to hire a gorilla to get it loose? Wait a minute, I didn’t need to hire a gorilla, because I had Lief. Except that Lief was nowhere to be seen when the vise was clamped down with 250 foot-pounds of torque.

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  2. The mocking never ends. Toddlers to teenagers….”you are embarassing me” as I am sitting in my living room watching a movie. How could I be? What did I possibly…….? Never mind, I guess it’s my job now. Bring it on.

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